I was relating the story to a lunch companion of mine this weekend about my first rehearsal of the Billy Joel classic song “New York State of Mind” and how singing the lyrics made me teary-eyed. I was awash with a torrent of memories of my 9 years in New York, especially the colorful and incorrigible (used as terms of endearment) characters I met there who made a huge imprint in my heart.
The simpatico “old soul” at lunch said to me: “You should go back to New York.” At that moment, that was probably the most appropriate thing to say…..
New York stood for an extraordinary chapter in my life. Maybe it was the particular stage in my life, the time in my life, the period in New York when there was a Wall Street bull run like no other and the types of people who crossed paths with me (a number of whom took care of me as though I was a part of their own family).
This confluence of factors, sad to say, can not be repeated in another place or at another time. The inner circle of people who redefined my standards of friendship and love by which future relationships will be measured against - people like Richard, Gisela, Leni, Joe and Eduardo – have all gone their separate ways. Some stayed in New York, one moved to Mexico City and another is currently in the midst of finding a new career wherever in the world her search may take her.
By the way, there are many other friends of mine who have impacted my life profoundly. Though you weren't mentioned by name, you know who you are and how much I appreciate your friendship.
I’ve lived here for almost four years now - in Emerging Markets, Third World, always on the verge of developing but haven’t yet developed Manila, Philippines in Southeast Asia. I have accepted that I am now a Philippine resident with a grace and peace that have been very hard to come by. In fact, only recently did I stop belligerently fighting the idea that one high-heeled clad foot of mine is permanently on Cathay Pacific.
Having said all that, I’m not saying I will never live anywhere else because I’ve learned that one never knows what the future brings. Besides, experience has proven to me that life is indeed full of surprises.
I have to admit, my life here in Manila is not the same life that I knew so well and loved dearly in New York, by any stretch of the imagination. It is oftentimes lacking in diversity, efficiency, candor, sensibility, excitement and unpredictability.
But it is a life rich with so many possibilities, on many different levels. A life that is overflowing with comfort, ease, warmth, flexibility, freedom and security of a support system of family and friends around me whom I can call on for help. With the added bonus of tropical weather all year and having the luxury of time to enjoy life, not just slave away at one's job.
Finally, after four years of struggling, I can finally announce to the world that I have arrived. I AM HOME. Every now and then, though, I still indulge myself in a “New York State of Mind” for old times’ sake. I can't help it, I truly miss the people I met in New York, more than the place itself. Because it's always the people you encounter that makes that place special to you.
The moment reality hits me again, I am reminded that my mind can wander however far back into my past life it wants to go but my heart is now where it belongs – in Manila.
There’s no better way to end this post than with the last few lines of the song that goes:
“I DON’T HAVE ANY REASONS BECAUSE I LEFT THEM ALL BEHIND. I’M IN A NEW YORK STATE OF MIND.”
Tina Vitas
Makati City
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
tina, honey, that is so sweet.
but you crack me up, dude.
only a couple weeks or so ago, you sent out a major rant about the failures of the philippines, the ingratitude and incompetence of your staff, etc.
i hope that you somehow found this "grace and peace" of which you speak from that and other recent experiences.
you are many many things, my love. outrageous, hilarious, vivacious,
dynamic, loyal, literate, etc.
peaceful and gracious? perhaps. but they're not the two qualities that
come to mind immediately.
tina, it is the scrappiness of you, the unwillingness to compromise, the unreasonable refusal to accept what others take for granted as unchangeable that is endearing. (though there are many names for this!! ha ha)
everything else is about growing and learning to be a bigger (if not taller) and better you than every day before.
we miss you here too.
xoxo
you should post more often!
Serendipty, thank you. Am trying to squeeze in the writing between running two businesses and building a few more this year. Granted, they are all SME's (small to medium sized enterprises), it is still time consuming. It makes me smile that I have a bigger audience than my friends whom I constantly impose my blog on......PINAYSIDEUP
Post a Comment